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The "Roseanne" reboot

April 3, 2018

The reboot of “Roseanne” returns tonight, and I’m sure many liberals will be watching the ratings closely, praying (if they believe in such things) that viewership falls so that they can write off the monumental debut ratings to nostalgia rather than “giving the people what they want” – the first hour of network TV in over a year that didn’t relentlessly insult Trump voters.

Infuriating spending

April 2, 2018

If you are fuming about the $21 trillion national debt that the government is saddling our grandchildren with, at least take heart that all that spending is both wise and necessary. We know from the great relief expressed by Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer that the “days of austerity” are over that whatever spending Washington has been doing over the past few years has been absolutely essential.

Like, for instance, spending $142 billion since 2009 on improper Medicare payments. Or $55 billion to maintain outdated computer technology instead of simply replacing it with better, cheaper, newer computers. Or $1.3 million for a social media campaign urging women not to spend too much time in tanning beds, plus $500,000 for a text message campaign telling people not to chew tobacco (the same message that’s on the chewing tobacco package.) Or $48 million to build the Afghan Ministry of Defense a new headquarters building, a project that ran five years late and $106 million over budget. Or a $412,000 grant for a scientific paper on whether glaciers should be studied from a feminist point of view. Or $3.4 million to study aggression and anxiety in fighting hamsters. Or $5 million for a Brown University study that determined that frat and sorority members drink more than other students. Or $3 million for a study to see if hearing the “Jaws” theme music gives people negative feelings about sharks.

I could go on all day, but I can’t decide whether to laugh or cry. For more of the most ridiculous and infuriating wastes of your tax money, click the link.

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PLEASE LEAVE ME A COMMENT. I READ THEM!

The same week Attorney General Jeff Sessions announced his decision not to appoint a special counsel to investigate misconduct at the FBI and DOJ, choosing instead to appoint a U.S. attorney to look into it, famed civil liberties attorney Alan Dershowitz was making it clear in interviews that the “criminalization of political differences” is wrong for democracy, no matter which side of the aisle is doing it.

Who is John Huber?

March 30, 2018

U.S. Attorney John Huber of Utah is the latest to be brought in to “investigate the investigators” at the FBI and Justice Department, in lieu of what many had concluded was the only way to get to the bottom of misconduct there: a special counsel.

VA Secretary fired

March 30, 2018

Another Trump Administration official has heard his famous catchphrase: “You’re fired!” Veterans Affairs Secretary David Shulkin was the last major holdover from the Obama Administration, kept on and promoted by Trump because of his outspoken criticism of the shocking VA scandals that had led to veterans dying on waiting lists for care while the officials responsible covered their rears and kept their jobs.

Collusion at the RNC?

March 30, 2018

With Robert Mueller’s indictment of 13 Russian nationals for allegedly trying to interfere with the 2016 election and Russia accused of poisoning an ex-spy and his daughter in London, President Trump expelled 60 Russian diplomats, and Russia retaliated by expelling 60 Americans.

Census fury

March 28, 2018

The Trump Administration’s decision to include a question about being a US citizen in the 2020 Census is being denounced by liberals, especially those from blue states with large numbers of illegal immigrants.
It’s amazing how much overlap there is in several stories going on right now. For example, while special counsel Robert Mueller’s team continues to investigate alleged but so-far-unsupported ties between the 2016 Trump campaign and “Russia Russia Russia,” Congress is examining alleged and very-much-supported ties between the Clintons and Russia as seen in the unfortunate (for us) Uranium One deal.
Hillary Clinton’s recent remarks in India, in which she blamed her Presidential loss in 2016 on Trump voters being racist and sexist, and on women obeying their husbands and voting against her, rightly generated so much angry backlash that Democrats up for reelection in red states are trying to build a “big, beautiful wall”...between them and Hillary.

Facebook apologizes

March 26, 2018

Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg took out full page ads in major Sunday newspapers (I’ll let the irony of that sink in for a while…Okay, ready to continue?) to apologize over the recent scandal involving unauthorized data gathering.
As more and more Republicans are concluding that there’s no alternative to a second special counsel to investigate bias and abuses of power by the FBI and Justice Department, more attention is being paid to the role played by Deputy Attorney Gen. Rod Rosenstein, and it’s about time, because he's the one who gave us Robert Mueller.

The Facebook data story

March 20, 2018

You’d think there would be enough in the news these days that really is shocking without seeing the stock market roiled by a giant wave of pretend shock over the “news” that details about users of social media platforms such as Facebook are mined and sold to companies that hope to persuade said users to do, buy or like certain things (for those who truly did just arrive here from the planet Antares, that’s known as “advertising.”)

Hope for Hollywood?

March 20, 2018

Maybe there’s hope for the movie industry after all: the new faith-based film, “I Can Only Imagine,” opened in third place last weekend, trailing only the giant blockbusters “Black Panther” and “Tomb Raider” that were on twice as many screens.

Hillary's apology

March 20, 2018

Hillary Clinton’s claim that women who didn’t vote for her were told not to by their husbands elicited plenty of heated reactions online, including some from powerful women who didn’t need a man to tell them to be royally ticked off.
I’ve been watching in amazement all the fuss and fury over the firing of former FBI Deputy Director Andrew McCabe, simply because career investigators and ethics officials in his own agency recommended it due to alleged offenses that other people have faced indictment over.
After all the hoopla, the special election for Pennsylvania's 18th District House seat ended with neither side able to declare full victory (Democrat Conor Lamb tried early on, but then, as Hillary Clinton taught us, not actually winning is no impediment to Democrats declaring themselves the winner).

This guest post is courtesy of Laura Ainsworth, who by day is a mild-mannered topical comedy writer/parodist for radio and the Internet, but by night changes into a sultry retro jazz singer/songwriter. Check out her acclaimed new album "New Vintage" and best-of vinyl LP "Top Shelf" at www.lauraainsworth.com.

THE LEGEND OF ELIZABETH WARREN

On the plains of Oklahoma
Nowhere near the Big-Sea water
Stood the wigwam of Liz Warren
Daughter of the Loon, Liz Warren
She was told from early childhood
Cherokees had intermarried
Making her their blood relation
This was really pretty common
On the plains of Oklahoma

Then she moved from Oklahoma
To the land called Massachusetts
Proud she was of being “native”
Checked the box for job at Harvard
Harvard used it in statistics
Showing they’re diverse in hiring
“Native” recipes she offered
For authentic native cookbook
Came straight from the Sunday paper

Made with crabmeat, so delicious
Cherokees would surely like them

Came to be a politician
In the land of Massachusetts
Used it running for the Senate
Criticized but didn’t waver
Stuck to her unlikely story
Evidence was not forthcoming
Didn’t matter to Progressives
She could say she hailed from Saturn
Daughter of the Loon --- elected!

Now it’s nearing 2020
Looking towards the next election
Got the nickname “Pocahontas”
Critics say the name is racist
But they really just don’t get it
“Pocahontas” isn’t racist
Only ridicules this woman
Makes good fun of old Liz Warren
When she truly does deserve it

She denies that she is running
But she says that she is native
When we know she likely isn’t
Why then should we just believe her
When she says she isn’t running?
Speaks the way they learn at Harvard
Lawyer-speak with tongue so fork-ed
Weasel words to give her leeway
Daughter of the Loon, a weasel


Now there is a DNA test
It is very inexpensive
This is based on proven science
Doesn’t lie like politicians
Doesn’t humor self-deception
Or deception of the voters
(Also tells you male or female ---
Estrogen will never change that
Nor will surgical “assignment”)

Pardon me for my digressing
We were speaking of Liz Warren

In the land of Massachusetts
Near the shining Big-Sea Water
Dwells a Presidential hopeful
Waiting for the perfect moment
To admit that she is running
Needs to quit the lame excuses
Just a drop of blood will tell it
Maybe Cherokee is in there
Maybe but I strongly doubt it

Americans keep trying to tell Hollywood that they have adopted a bad business model by constantly insulting at least half their potential audience, but they just don’t seem to be getting the message (an odd Achilles heel for people who are supposedly in the communications business).
If we could all climb into our time machines and visit any day in the months leading up to Robert Mueller’s appointment, we’d find the same thing on every news channel: absolutely everyone with a “D” after his or her name going on about the need for a special counsel to investigate “Russia Russia Russia,” with a laser-beam focus on finding ties with the Trump campaign.
Today's Commentary: The NEW YORKER puts its slant on Steele dossier -- Latest Parkland shooting doesn't restore my faith in FBI -- Hard to take anti-gun politicians seriously -- Baltimore Mayor's bias on display -- What if we left it up to Cleaver? -- Additional Mike Huckabee commentaries